Wish You Were Here
by perfect.imperfectionxo
Summary: If Elena chose Stefan, Damon would leave. That was the deal. Elena wasn't as fond of the idea, even after the blow had a chance to heal over. Delena.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note: **I don't know why I wrote this, but I did. It kinda sucks in my eyes but whatever. It seems really jumpy. Everything up to 3x22 in the show is canon except Rebekah didn't make Matt and Elena go over Wickery Bridge. So she's also still human. I don't own TVD. If you like it, please consider reviewing.

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_Damon,_

_I don't know why I'm writing this. If you wanted to hear from me, you would come back to Mystical Falls, or call me, or... something. I don't even know where you are right now, Damon. I haven't heard from you in two years. I haven't heard a single word from you in two years now. I don't even remember the sound of your voice anymore now._

_I'm starting to forget your face, as well. It used to be clear as day. Your beautiful blue eyes, the way you would smile at me when you were happy with me, everything. It's fading now, though. I remember what __**should **__be there, but I can't see it anymore._

_I miss you, Damon. I miss you and your beautiful face and the way you always cared for me. It still hurts being away from. I love you. I never said it to your face but, Damon, I really and truly love you. Honestly, I think I did just the opposite. You must have felt like I hated you, like you would never amount to anything compared to Stefan. I took advantage of you being there simply because I knew you would, because you promised you wouldn't leave me again._

_I don't blame you for leaving, though I wish you had at least said goodbye before you did._

_I wonder how you're doing some times. Where you are, what you've seen, who you've met, who you've loved. Sometimes I consider asking Stefan where you are, sending you a real letter, trying to get in actual contact with you... Then I realize just how __**bad**__ an idea that really is. I mean, he won, right? You had to leave, didn't you? That was your deal..._

_I wish that didn't have to happen, though. I wish you could have stayed and been with us, with me, a little longer. You know, I never was able to love Stefan like I did before. He was never... himself. He was distant and uncaring at times and I didn't feel like he tried for us any. Why would he have to? I mean, his only threat left, right?_

_I hope you're doing all right, Damon. I hope you're enjoying yourself and being you. I love you. I hope that maybe, just maybe, you'll come back some time._

_Love,_

_Elena_

Her pencil shook in her hand as her eyes scanned through the words, her fingers gripping it tightly. Tears welled in the corner of her eyes, threatening to break free. Elena had to look away from it.

Carefully and precisely, she folded the paper in to thirds and leaned over her bed, awkwardly scrambing to pull a mahogany wood box out from the confines of beneath her bed. She placed it atop her sheets.

A good five minutes passed before she reached over the box and removed its lid, revealing the mass of folded paper strewn about in what appeared to be a disorderly chaos. They were all folded in to thirds, all matching the paper she had just finished, and they all were in perfect condition.

Elena wouldn't let any harm come to her box of memories.

She placed the new letter on top, careful not to bend or crinkle the pages, and then gently realigned them to be perpendicular with the left side. She placed the pencil in her right hand beside them, and then put the lid back on to the box.

She was returning the box to its home beneath her bed when Stefan arrived.

"What are you doing, Elena?" He asked, confusion evident in his tone.

Her eyes went wide as she carefully shoved her precious box away from her. Frantic, Elena grabbed a sweater from her floor and clambered back up to her bed.

"Dropped this," she lied, holding up the sweater.

Stefan could never know what she was actually doing.


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Note:** Well since the first chapter had a positive response and I actually liked writing it, I figured I would continue. I currently have no idea where this will go or anything. Also it won't all be letters. So uh, here's the next segment. I don't own TVD or the Salvatore brothers (but would wouldn't want to?) and if you enjoy the story, please favorite or review (:

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_Damon,_

_Another month has passed and I still haven't heard a word from you. Do I classify as obsessed yet? I feel like I should, but that's such a horrible word to associate with the way I love you._

_Stefan mentioned you today. It's probably the first time he's done that since you left. He said that he talked to you, that you said you were doing okay. He said you were in France, and that you were having a good time. I hope you weren't lying, Damon. I hope you __**really**__ are having a good time there. Though I don't doubt you are._

_I'm in Florida right now, though maybe Stefan told you that when he talked to you. He thought a trip, just the two of us, would be nice. It is nice, I'll give it that, but it would be better if you were around. You always had a way of making the day brighter... Well, usually, at least._

_Stefan's becoming more obnoxious day by day. He found my box when I packed it for our trip. I swear he looked like he wanted to strangle me when I refused to let him see what was inside. I don't feel like we have any boundaries anymore. I don't feel like I'm allowed to be my own person anymore. Stefan wants to control it all. _

_Why had I been so hard pressed against loving you? You were the one that stayed when things got bad, you tried to save Stefan when he became the ripper. I doubt you did that fully for yourself. Even if I didn't appreciate the manner in which you did it, you always looked out for me._

_I wish you were able to write me back. At least then these letters wouldn't seem so redundant, I'd be able to cater to what you've said._

_But I can't._

_I love you, Damon. I hope you're having a blast._

_Love,_

_Elena_

Elena let out a sigh, holding the paper between her hands. It wasn't like the others, it was scrawled on to a fancy blue paper with a dolphin watermark at the bottom - it was a part of a notebook she had purchased from a small shop down the road from the hotel in which she was staying. She let her head fall back, collapsing against several well-fluffed pillows, and let out a sigh.

Water was spraying down in the bathroom, Stefan was having a shower. It was the first time since they had arrived in Miami four days ago that she had even a moment to herself, and she was desperately wishing that the time wouldn't end. As soon as Stefan was out of the shower, she would have to put her letter away, hide her box away.

She glanced to her side, where her suitcase lay open, her box fit snugly against one of the sides. A hint of a smile formed on her face as she placed her paper down on the other side of her, and reached over to pull the box out it. She sat up and opened it, placing the lid to the side.

Elena placed her letters in an orderly manner in front of her, eyes scanning each individual folded paper.

There were twenty-three of them. One written at the end of each month since Damon had left, excepting the one she had just wrote.

She picked up the first one, unfolded it as carefully as she had folded it, and exhaled.

_Damon,_

_Today your phone is officially out of service. Not that you would care anyways, right? I mean, you've been ignoring my calls for the last month anyway. And my texts, and my emails, and every attempt to contact you. Where did you go, Damon? Why are you avoiding me? _

_You knew that I had to go see Stefan. You knew that - not because of Stefan but because of Caroline. Tyler. Damon, I had to. I couldn't lose all of them. And then I lost none of them. But you. I lost you. I wish I hadn't, Damon. I said I'd see you, right? I didn't give up on you, I was going to come right to you as soon as I got the chance because I wasn't going to lose you._

_I'm sorry that you decided to hate me. You know, I deserve it._

_But you know what else? I think I love you, Damon. No, I know I do - because I didn't hurt even __**half **__this much when Stefan left me. _

_So please Damon, come back home. Please._

_-Elena_

Somehow, Elena couldn't bring herself to tear her eyes away from the first letter she had written, her words, the pain she had felt - it all hit her just like it had before.

That was when she heard the familiar sound of Stefan's phone ringing from the nightstand on the other side of the bed. She reached over to check it out.

She froze as she saw the name that lit up the screen.

_Damon._


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's Note:**Well this is a little longer than the last few chapters and I feel like it may be a little rambley in parts. If you see any problems, feel free to point them out - it's appreciated as long as you don't act like a jerk about it. This would have been up a long time ago but my computer would continually crash every time I tried to write more than a couple hundred words. I'm tempted to write Damon's view of this scene... Opinions on that? If you have one, or you liked the story, consider sending in a review! I don't own TVD though I would willingly own Damon Salvatore if I could.

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_She froze as she saw the name that lit up the screen._

_Damon._

Elena stared at the phone, at the name lighting up its screen, unable to bring herself to touch the phone and answer the call. Her hand rested against her letters, and the phone rung twice more. She must looked like a deer caught in the headlights to anyone who would have seen her at that moment - and she felt like it, too.

Her eyes went from the folded papers resting before her, to the bathroom behind her in which the shower was still running, and back to Stefan's phone resting on the nightstand.

One last glance towards the bathroom and a quick check that the water was still, in fact, running, and then Elena reached across the bed, snatched Stefan's phone off of the table and quickly hit the 'answer call button, pulling the phone to her ear.

"Took you long enough to answer, Stefan." Elena's voice fell open in to a small 'o' shape at the sound of Damon's voice. Though there was a hint of impatience and irritation in his voice, Elena still felt like she melted under his words.

What was she supposed to say now?

"You know, Stefan, it's awfully rude of you to answer your brother's call only to not talk to him. Are you there? Or are you busy? I suppose with your little treasure you probably are. It would be just like you to torture me like that, brother."

His little treasure? What did Damon mean?

It took her a second to clue in that the treasure Damon was referencing was _her._

Just the thought of them thinking about her like that made her feel uncomfortable. And what did Damon mean, he supposed Stefan would be busy because she was around?

Did they actually think about her like that?

Now, more than anything, Elena felt a little hurt. She was half tempted to end the call right there, without even saying a word. She got the sound of his voice back now, right?

"Stefan? Are you there?" Damon sounded more annoyed than he had the previous time.

_No, Stefan isn't there, _she thought to herself in a sharp tone. _His girlfriend, aka that treasure you're talking about? Yeah, that's who's here._

"Stefan?"

"No," Elena stated simply, her hand reaching out to gently splay the papers in to a neat line. Each and every last one of them held word after word of things that she had wanted to say to Damon, things that she still did want to say to Damon.

But not right now. Not like this. This was all wrong, not at all like how she wanted it to go, and she hadn't even said two words.

And they _thought she was treasure. _That disheartened her to no end. She knew, that for at least a little while, she could have been considered a prize – but that was before she fell in love with them – before _they _claimed to have fallen in love with her.

As soon as they said those words, they lost all chance to claim her like that. Love was supposed to be honest, right? True? Elena knew that it was far from perfect, but when you love someone, they weren't a possession. They weren't a trophy or a prize to be won. They were precious and wonderful and amazing and fifty other words Elena couldn't think of.

"Elena?" She sensed a dash of happiness and a hint of heartbreak in Damon's silky smooth voice, which quivered just slightly as he said her name.

"Yeah. Stefan's in the shower. I'll tell him you called." She didn't let her voice betray any bit of the way she felt about this call already.

"No," Damon returned, not even an ounce of hesitation in his voice as he spoke. "No. Please."

"Look, Damon, he obviously won't want you touching his treasure so you might as well not even try." She could feel tears threatening to well in the corners of her eyes, and she was incredibly glad that neither Salvatore was around to see her.

There was another long, silence-filled pause before Damon responded.

"You heard that." He sounded mortified almost.

"Yeah a little."

"I didn't mean it, Elena, not like you think I do – and don't tell me you're not thinking what you are."

"No, Damon, you just didn't mean for me to hear it."

"Elena, please. I don't want to argue with you." He let out a sigh before continuing. "Please, Elena. I miss the sound of your voice. Come on, just talk. You _know _I would never think of you like that. You _know it, _Elena."

She swallowed what felt like a ball in her throat, glancing over at the bathroom. Water was still running – Stefan was still in the shower. He would be out soon, though. He never took longer than twenty minutes, and he was more than three quarters through by now.

Elena wanted to give in to Damon's request, to talk to him and just... let go. Say things. Talk about how life had been – both of theirs.

But he left her – he had left her without even a goodbye and it had hurt her. Now she felt objectified in addition to that, and she just wasn't _ready _to say anything. What was one supposed to say in this sort of situation?

Besides all the drama in Mystic Falls, Elena didn't have much life experience. She had Stefan, though that became less and less enthralling as each day passed, but she knew he would be there. She trusted him, he trusted her.

She hadn't the least bit of an idea how you started a conversation with someone who left you without a word over two years ago.

"Yeah. Time flies when you run away from your problems, doesn't it?" Her response came out more sharp than she had wanted it to, a natural defense mechanism. He couldn't get in to her if she wouldn't open up, right?

"I didn't run away, Elena," Damon returned. He didn't even sound the least bit annoyed, though. If anything he sounded... sad. Regretful – like he felt like he had done something wrong.

"What do you call it, then?" Her eyes scanned across the letters again, remembering the way each and every last one proclaimed her love for him. Now she felt like it was being put to the test – and prevailing.

She couldn't stay angry at Damon – at least not fully, not even if she wanted to.

He could irritate her and get on her nerves, he had been able to since day one, but he was never able to make her truly hate him. Right now was a prime example - it had been two years since he had graced her with his sight and now he thought he would just be able to claim her love and get what he wanted from her - and she wanted to give in to it, even though she knew she shouldn't. She knew that she should hang up and tell him that she hated him and never wanted to hear from him. She knew she _could _do that - and she knew how badly that would have hurt the Damon she had known before.

Would it hurt the one who left her, though?

"I had to go, Elena," Damon said. "I'm a man of my word. Even if I wasn't, I doubt Stefan would have let me stay."

"A man of your word?" Elena choked a little as she said those words. _Liar. _

"I told Stefan I would leave if you chose him. You did. We could have died that day, and you chose him-"

"You promised me that you wouldn't leave me again."

More silence. More unbroken, thought-filled emotional silence.

"I know."

"And you know what? I thought you were _dead. _Damon, there are no words for how much that hurt... and then Stefan told me you _left. _Just... upped and left, like it was all nothing."

Another moment of silence passed. Oh _God, _Elena was starting to hate silence.

"I'm sorry. Look, Elena-"

"Damon, we shouldn't even be talking right now. Man of your word, right?"

"Why won't you talk to me, Elena?" Was that a hint of desperation she heard in his voice? Like he would do anything just to keep her there, talking to him? It sure felt like that,

"I don't know what to say, Damon," Elena sighed. "You left me without a word and I only hear from you now because of a fluke accident. Because your brother decided to take a shower at the wrong time."

Another round of silence struck.

"I'm sorry that I can't think of anything to say to you," Elena continued. "I guess... I guess I thought things would be different when we got to talk again. I really hoped they would be."

More silence. After a while, Elena started to wonder if Damon was even still there. All she heard was light static and no ringing in the phone, which meant he hadn't hung up on her, but all was silent on his side.

That was when the sound of running water cut off in the background.

"Stefan's done showering. I have to go now," Elena said as her spare hand gathered her letters together and put them back in their spot in the pale wooden box.

"I promise you, Elena, I _will _make up for all of this one day."

The other line went dead as Damon hung up. Elena quickly pressed the 'end cal' button on her own side and put Stefan's phone back on the nightstand where it had came from. She put her box away in her suitcase, zipped it up and put it down on the floor.

Elena simply sat on the bed, legs crossed and hands resting together on her lap.

She couldn't get Damon's last words out of her head.


End file.
